


Tell It With Style

by ShipMaester



Series: Stonestag and Ladydire [3]
Category: A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/M, Fluff and Crack, Non-Canon Relationship, Out of Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-03
Updated: 2015-07-03
Packaged: 2018-04-07 11:16:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,920
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4261296
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShipMaester/pseuds/ShipMaester
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This one-shot is part 3 of the Stonestag and Ladydire series and needs at least the first story of that series to make sense.  Sansa finds a creative way to tell her husband something very important, leading them to being a bit creative in how they tell others.</p><p>GRRM's owns all his toys . . . the poor child plays with them with when he's not looking with no profit to be had.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Tell It With Style

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Tommyginger](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tommyginger/gifts), [spittingfeathers](https://archiveofourown.org/users/spittingfeathers/gifts), [Jennilynn411](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jennilynn411/gifts).



> Once again, this is gifted, with many thanks, to Tommyginger, Jennilynn411, and Spittingfeathers since this was born out of one of our comment-a-thons.

King's Landing 2016

 

Stannis Baratheon

For a man who a year ago would have described himself as a stick in the mud, Stannis knew the woman before him had not so much changed him as brought out things he had no idea were hidden deep within.  Sometimes it was hard to keep up with her imagination.  There were the chatroom sessions at lunch that strayed into territory he never thought he’d go.  They talked every day at lunch, nevertheless at least once or twice during the week, sometimes more, it was necessary to retreat into his washroom and put an end to what she began when she realized he had had a particularly stressful morning at BE.  Thank the gods Ms. Mormont didn’t ask him why he carried the files he used for camouflage with him.  She probably did think he read reports sitting on the toilet.  Then again, it wasn’t something he could say he had never done.

Sansa normally let him work until he was satisfied that he was finished for the day.  Since before they were married, after she had moved in, he had learned that reports could be read once and not three times with pretty much the same result; some meetings did not take as long to plan as others, thus buying him a good hour per day less work time in the evening; and Robert wasn’t as incompetent as he wanted Stannis to believe. 

Sometimes, however, Sansa did feel the need to distract him from work and thus, she invented Strip Scrabble.  After five months of marriage, the game was now reserved for the last night of the work-week.  He would do whatever work he’d brought home while Sansa would set up the board in the sitting room that adjoined their bedroom.  The game usually started about an hour after Shireen went to bed and they were positive she was sound asleep.   No game was every played until all tiles were used.  The rules of Strip Scrabble were that each played a word and the person with the lowest scoring word took off something they were wearing.  The first time he saw her do it, Stannis was amazed at how Sansa managed to get her bra off without removing her shirt.   The game ended when the first one was naked, and sometimes in ended before that. 

They both sat down at the table between their high-back chairs.  Sansa handed him a glass of ice-water and lemon.  She had a similar glass in her hand, though hers would be sweetened into being lemonade.  Handing her the bag, she pulled out a tile and showed him a Y.  He pulled out an A.  Stannis would go first. 

Stannis picked seven tiles out of the bag and set them on the rack in front of him.  Three As, two Bs, and three Ys.  _THREE Ys?_   He really thought there were only two Ys in the game.  _And to get both of the two Bs?_     He could make BAY and BABY.  BABY scored the most points, so BABY it was . . . eleven points.  Stannis smirked at her; she would have a hard time beating that one so the first sandal was about to come off.  Sansa always started with her shoes. 

While she recorded the score and looked at her own tiles, Stannis picked four more tiles and placed them on the rack.  Three Bs and another A.  He looked at the rack and then at the board.  Sansa had played her word off of his . . . BABY. 

For a long moment, he just stared at her while she beamed back at him.  They had talked about it, hoped for it sooner rather than later, he knew Sansa prayed for it, and had certainly worked on it.  Still . . . Stannis couldn’t quite take it all in.  “How far along?” he asked finally. 

 “Six weeks.”  She saved him having to ask his next question, “I had it verified with a blood test.”   

He knew he needed to move.  He needed to take her into his arms and tell her how pleased he was . . . how over the moon he was!  Yet, all he could do at the moment was stare at her.  With the utmost of patience, Sansa got up and rounded the table.  Stannis pulled his chair out from the table in order to stand, but before he could, she set herself on his lap and wrapped her arms around his neck.  Stannis buried his face in her shoulder and for the third time he could ever remember, he cried. 

Stannis didn’t show emotion when he was hurt, upset, or unhappy.  He didn’t cry when his parents died.  He didn’t shed a tear when Shireen clung to him asking where her mother had gone.  He didn’t show an ounce of emotion when Robert told him he couldn’t think of him as a brother because he more like a machine.   

It now seemed he cried when he was supremely happy.  The first time was, after two miscarriages, doctors put a healthy Shireen in his arms.  The doctors were too busy and Selyse too tired to notice.  The second was when Sansa agreed to marry him.  Stannis meant to ask her on her nameday with a well-planned scheme.  Instead, he awkwardly blurted out the question while she was in tears over burning a dinner she tried to make for the three of them.  She looked at him and smiled through her tears, said yes, and then cried even harder.  Later that night as she slept peacefully spooned against him, it was his turn to let it all out.  And now, this news that she was carrying his child brought him to this embarrassing state yet again . . . with one of the two people he most wanted to think of him as a pillar of strength as a witness.  Sansa didn’t look shocked or upset at his reaction.  It was never sobbing or what Sansa termed the ugly cry as she had done that one night.  Tears ran unchecked down his face and, presently, onto Sansa’s shoulder.  She stroked his hair and his back until he was able to regain his composure.

After what seemed hours to him, yet was probably less than five minutes, Stannis pulled his head back up and faced her.  “You know,” he asserted, a bit leery of another scene at saying the words, “I am thrilled.”

“I know,” she replied.

Stannis looked over at the Scrabble board with the two instances of the word _BABY_.  “Just how many games did you have to buy to get those tiles?”

“It took fifteen to get thirty Bs, thirty Ys.  There were more than enough As at that point to have forty of them, although I only put in thirty.  I was afraid you’d draw all As.” 

Stannis chucked.  That’s his girl . . . very thorough! 

“I saved all the pieces, so I can put the games back together and give them to an assisted living residence or the children’s hospital.”

 _Oh no she wasn’t!_ “I will make any donation you want to both places in honor of our baby; however, this board and these pieces are going nowhere except to a framer.  It will make a nice art piece for the nursery.”

Sansa was quiet for a moment and then she buried her head into his shoulder and began the ugly cry, making his earlier display look like he sniffled once.  “What did I do?” he stammered.

The words took a while for Sansa to get out.  “I,” punctuated with sobs, “love,” a rather indelicate sniffle and a bit more sobbing, “you,” even more sobbing, “so,” a hiccup with a sob, “much.”

Stannis took a deep breath and let it out. He’d never said the words to her except in their vows, despite knowing she was fully aware of it.  “I love you more.”

 

 

Shireen Baratheon

“Sweetheart, we have a gift for you,” Mama announced after they had finished putting the supper dishes in the dishwasher.  Mama was a bit embarrassed about not being able to cook, so she insisted that she wash dishes and that Shaena, their cook and housekeeper, be free to leave after dinner was ready.  Father would help Mama, but now that she was older and had grown a whole inch in the last four moon-cycles, Shireen wanted to be the one helping. 

Father was waiting for them in the library, his reading glasses sitting on top of his head.  He patted the place next to where he sat on the settee and she sat there snuggled up against him to make room for Mama.  Shireen saw the box wrapped in pink paper with a bow just as Mama took it off the shelf and brought it across the library to hand to her.  Shireen was a bit confused.  It wasn’t that they only gave her gifts on her nameday and special occasions; it was that the gifts she received other than those days were usually not wrapped. 

Eagerly, she opened the pretty paper and then the box, while Mama sat on the other side of her and Father draped an arm around the back of the settee.  It was a new shirt, a tee-shirt, in her favorite shade of dark pink.  When she picked up the shirt, it had something written on it.  Shireen held it up and read the words . . . _World’s Best Sister!_    

“Where is it?” Shireen asked, eyes big as saucers.  She was confused and excited all at the same time.  Looking at Mama, she didn’t see anything sticking out of her tummy.   “I thought the baby would be in your tummy?” 

Mama reached over and smoothed her hair.  “He or she is there, Sweetheart.  The baby will keep growing until ready to meet you in about seven moon-cycles.” 

Shireen was all excitement now, looking back and forth between her parents.  “Did you get it on your honeymoon?”  Her eyes settled on her father for an answer.

“No.  Uh . . . your new sibling was acquired after we returned.” 

Sibling was a new word to her and she assumed it meant brother or sister. She saw Mama’s light up and knew she thought something was funny, though Shireen wasn’t sure exactly what.  _Where did they get my sibling from?_   Addressing her father again, “If you got the baby and put it in Mama’s tummy, how come you don’t know if it’s a boy or a girl?”

Her father looked uncomfortable and shifted in his seat.  Shireen was still waiting for an answer to her question.  “It’s ‘why don’t you know whether,’ not ‘how come you don’t know if’,” he corrected, clearing his throat.  Father didn’t do as much of that as he used to do, thankfully. His eyes went from her to Mama and he looked like he was asking her for something without really asking. 

Kissing the top of her head, Mama explained.  “We don’t get to see the baby until it’s born, Sweetheart.  We will know whether you’re going to have a brother or sister in a few moon-cycles, only you will not get to meet him or her for about seven more moon-cycles.  You and I will go out for ice cream later this week and I will tell you more, okay?” 

“Okay!”  Shireen looked back at Father; whatever made him uncomfortable earlier seemed to be better now. 

“This baby will need you to be ready to teach him or her things,” Mama added.

“Just like Aunt Arya said you taught her things.” Shireen wanted to assure them that she understood and knew her responsibility.  She had been praying for a baby sister or brother. 

Mama hugged her again, “Exactly like that!” 

Shireen smiled brightly at both her parents.  Mama returned her smile and Father looked at her in that way that was just for her.  Shireen wondered if he would look at her new sibling that way too.  Probably.  Steff Seaworth told her how sometimes Stanny was mean to him when they were really little because he was jealous, which was stupid because their parents loved them, their older brother Devan, and her too.  She wouldn’t be that way because Father and Mama would love all their children just like Uncle Davos and Aunt Marya. 

Shireen grabbed the shirt and held it up again.  “I _am_ going to be the world’s best sister!”   

 

Davos Seaworth

Davos owed his wife, his family, his job, and probably his life to Stannis Baratheon, even though you would never get Stannis to admit it.  There was a time when Davos wouldn’t have admitted it either.  Orphaned in Flea Bottom at thirteen, Davos did what he needed to do to survive after he left his last foster home at sixteen.  Davos crewed for a smuggler, Salladhor Saan, who saw to it that he had food and a roof, as well as some spending money, as long as he didn’t ask questions.  During that time, he grew to love the sea and all crafts that moved on her waters . . . whether by sail or motor. 

He was nineteen when he met Stannis Baratheon at the marina and offered to help him swab the deck of his twelve meter schooner just to get a look inside.  Stannis didn’t know about his other activates and asked him to help crew once in a while.  Fascinated that a guy close to his own age had a two-mast sailboat, and that he’d even let him on it, Davos had agreed to help him crew it one weekend instead of going out on a smuggling run.  That invitation kept him from doing time in prison.  In open waters, Saan’s cigarette boat died and ended up in a gunfight with the coast patrol when they were discovered.  Saan surrendered and he and his crew were eventually imprisoned for both the stash of cocaine and opiates they were carrying and for shooting at authorities.  Davos was relieved at not being with them, but he also suffered survivor’s guilt and a good deal of remorse.  It had been better when he had no idea what the contraband was. His mother had overdosed on opiates.

Davos and Stannis became friends and Stannis let him sleep in the schooner’s cabin, paying him to both crew and maintain it.  During one sailing trip, Davos confessed his past.  To this day, he didn’t know what made him do it.  That day was when he learned how rigid Stannis could be.  Calmly, as if giving stock advice, Stannis informed him that he had to turn himself in and if he didn’t, Stannis would. 

It was later that Davos learned that the attorney Stannis insisted he be allowed to hire was the best in Westeros.  Mr. Arryn negotiated everything down to misdemeanors because they had no real evidence, nor did the district attorney’s office want to pursue it since they already had Saan.  Davos did a fair amount of community service and five years’ probation.  All the while, he lived on the schooner and finally caved in when Stannis insisted he go to college while Stannis pursued his graduate degree.  Davos wouldn’t take charity, yet he would never deny Stannis made it easy for him to pay him back.  He met Marya in college and had been Stannis’ closest, some say only, friend for almost twenty years. 

Since Stannis’ marriage to Sansa, the two couples made sure to either have a cookout every other week and hire a professional sitter one night a month to take care of Stanny, Steff, and Shireen while they went out to dinner.  Marya and Sansa had become fast friends and often went shopping together or on excursions with the kids. 

Tonight they were at a Qohorian restaurant.  It had been a very pleasant evening, Marya and Sansa being chatty while allowing Davos to crack an occasional joke with Stannis listening as he always did.  When dinner was over, all but Stannis ordered coffee and four fortune cookies came with it.  These were always good for a laugh. 

Marya was the first to get hers open and she shrieked as soon as she read it.  “I told you so!” she said looking at him without any further explanation before breaking out into a laugh.  Sansa began laughing with her and the two women joined hands across the table in some shared sense of glee.  Stannis was watching his face as a confused Davos read his fortune and then broke out into a huge grin . . . _You will be an aunt and uncle again in seven months_.  Davos wasn’t quite as happy as when Marya told him about being pregnant with each of their three sons, but he was pretty damned close. 

 

Ned Stark

It was now a tradition for all the kids to be home the weekend of Westerosi Day, working it out to be at least a four-day visit home.  Ned wasn’t sure Stannis would take time off from BE to be part of the family celebration, and if he did come with Sansa and Shireen, how he’d take the boisterousness that went with such a large family gathering. 

Ned was pleasantly surprised when Sansa said all three would be flying in.  He was even more surprised when Stannis actually showed up.  Catelyn still wasn’t terribly fond of Stannis even though she couldn’t deny how happy Sansa looked during their weekly video conferences on the net.  She refused to see what others easily saw . . . Sansa married one like her father.  Sure, he wasn’t quite as stoic as Stannis.   At least he didn’t want to think he was.  It would be nice to have someone hang back and not necessarily join in every game and event the rest of the Stark clan cooked up for the long weekend. 

He had never seen Sansa look so lovely.  She positively glowed and Ned remembered a time after Joffrey and she broke up that he didn’t think his little girl would ever smile or laugh again.  Marriage seemed to agree with Stannis, as well.  He had gained a few pounds and no longer looked like a pole with broad shoulders.   Little Shireen was a delightful addition to their family and while she was not Sansa’s by blood, it was amazing how much they were natured alike.  Shireen’s only resemblance to Selyse Baratheon was her ears and, he had to take Catelyn’s word on this, the shape of her mouth.  The rest of her was Stannis’ look and a personality much like Sansa’s as a child. 

That evening after the most food he’d ever seen cooked on four grills manned by Robb, Jon, Stannis, and himself, Sansa suggested they play Pictionary.  Games were big during the Westerosi Day family weekend and he reserved the right to stay as an observer rather than a player. 

It was a family joke that Pictionary always started with Jon because he was so poor at it and the team with the short straw got him.  He took the ribbing with the same good nature he gave similar in other respects, such as Arya being able to beat Bran at arm-wrestling.  By blood, Jon was his nephew, but he had been raised at Winterfell after his mother, Ned’s sister Lyanna, became so severely depressed and couldn’t care for herself or Jon.  Jon’s natural father was already married.  Medications developed over the last ten years had improved Lyanna’s condition.  She married a Redwyne and moved to Ashford in The Reach.  Jon chose to stay in The North.

Jon was now on Team Gray with Jeyne, Sansa, and Bran.  Catelyn handed him a phrase and he drew a slanted line that was supposed to be a needle and what he later said was a sundial.  Rather than draw anything else, Jon just kept pointing to what he first drew on the pad until Stannis, who did agree to participate by being timekeeper, called that time was up.  No one guessed _A Stitch in Time_. 

Robb led for Team White, with Ygritte, Arya, and Rickon for teammates.  His two little ones, Benjen and Jocelyn, were outside playing with Shireen.  Catelyn handed him a phrase and he drew a circle with a straight line to the far right  of it with lines with arrows going from the circle to the straight line, then from the line diagonally downward, then back up to the circle.

“Back and forth,” Rickon tried, only to have Catelyn tell him he was wrong.

Robb embellished the straight line to look three-dimensional, causing Arya to yell out, “Bouncing off the wall!”  Bran groaned out a, “How did she get that from what he drew?” when Catelyn pronounced that she was correct. 

Sansa was up next.  Ned noticed Stannis moving forward in his seat, keenly observing her and the others in the room.  The Baratheon brothers were always very competitive, so Stannis’ interest in how well his wife did wasn’t much of a surprise. 

Catelyn handed her a slip of paper and Sansa looked at it briefly and began to draw the profile of a face with long hair.  Sansa was good at drawing and this could be said to resemble her somewhat.  Then she began to draw a body.  “Hurry up!” Bran yelped. 

Ned noticed his wife looked a bit confused, but Sansa kept drawing.  Stannis wasn’t paying attention to the time and Ned meant to keep an eye on it for him, but then he began to pay attention to what Sansa was drawing. 

“Fat woman?” Ygritte was the first to guess.  Catelyn just shook her head.

Sansa exaggerated the forward protusion of the belly of her drawing and Catelyn shot out of her chair.  “Oh my gods, Sansa’s pregnant!” 

“That’s the phrase?” Rickon blurted out, as Ygritte squealed. 

Suddenly, Sansa was pounced on by her mother, Arya, and her good sisters.  It took a few seconds more for her brothers and cousin to realize this was Sansa’s way of breaking the news.  They each took their turn embracing and congratulating her.  Ned looked over at Stannis and nodded a silent congratulations; Stannis nodded back. 

Ned waited patiently for the others to disengage from his daughter before making his way to her, while Catelyn passed him on her way to hug her good son, whether he wanted her to or not.  Ned kissed Sansa’s cheek and then hugged her to him, careful not to embrace her too tightly although he knew such caution wasn’t really necessary.  “You feel okay?” he whispered.

“Never better, Dad.”  

 

 

Renly Baratheon

“Do you know what this meeting is about?” Renly sulked as he walked into Robert’s office just before nine in the morning. 

Robert looked up from his desk, bleary eyed from a night with Jim Beam and one of Littlefinger’s premium whores, “Hell no.  I don’t know any more than what was in the email calendar invite . . . that it’s financially urgent.” 

Looking at his mobile for the time, Renly plopped into one of the two leather chairs opposite Robert’s desk.  “Where is he?  He’s late.”  Both brothers knew late for Stannis meant he wasn’t there fifteen minutes before the meeting was to start. 

“Damned if I know,” Robert returned, rubbing his temples.  “I just hope this isn’t going to take longer than him telling us what he is going to do to solve whatever it is and let us get on with our day.” 

It was nine on the dot when Stannis walked into Robert’s office and handed them both a sheet of paper, reserving one copy for himself.  He stiffly sat down in the remaining chair.  “These are your new duties starting at the beginning of the month,” Stannis declared in his best Chief Operating Officer authoritative voice.  It didn’t have Robert’s boom, but it was still equally effective and tended to cause far more fear with its calm menace. 

Renly read the paper in confusion.  It started with a line item entitled, _Robert’s Responsibilities_ and a list of bulleted tasks.  Next was an item, _Renly’s Initial Responsibilities_ with yet another list of bulleted tasks.  Each list contained four or five bullets.  Before he could comment, Robert did it for both of them with a nice bark for emphasis.  “Just what the hell is this?”

Stannis was, as expected, not the least bit phased by Robert raising his voice.  “I’m abdicating some of my responsibilities, ones that shouldn’t have been mine to start with, to you.  Renly’s is a list of those things he’s going to start with to learn to take over as COO.” 

“For what reason?” Renly inquired.  There was no way Stannis would trust him with any of this. 

“Because, little brother, Robert will retire sometime in the next five to ten years if the drinking and whoring doesn’t get him first, and I will take over as CEO.  You need to start training to be COO.”

“I don’t want to be COO,” he declared and looked to Robert for help.  His oldest brother merely continued to rub his temples while trying to focus on the paper.

Stannis shrugged.  “Then your salary will be used to offset the cost of hiring or promoting someone to COO and instead of a raise in your so called salary, you will get nothing.”

Renly’s eyes nearly popped out of his head.  “You can’t do that!”

It was Robert who answered, “As CEO, he could.”

“Then I want to be CEO!”

This got a bellowing chuckle from Robert and an eye roll from Stannis.  “Tell us what you really want,” Robert put on his negotiator hat, although Stannis usually outranked everyone in that department. 

“I want work days that are closer to ten or eleven hours than thirteen or fourteen,” Stannis started.  “I want to take off a moon-cycle around the beginning of next year.  I want Renly to stop being a boy and grow up.  And, I want you to man up and get over the divorce and the kids, and help me run this company like our father would have wanted.” 

Renly pouted at being told he was acting like a boy.  “You’ll keep on doing what you’ve always done, Stannis.  We all know it!  You live, eat, breathe, and shit out Baratheon Enterprises.”  He only brought out the vulgarities when he was desperate.

Shrugging, Stannis ratcheted up his scowl a notch.  “That I have, but it will tone down.  Unlike you, if BE goes under, I’ve still got enough of my money protected such that my lifestyle won’t change whether we have two children or twenty.  Sansa and my children will get more of my attention from now on.”

“Don’t think I don’t know you’re bluffing big brother!  I don’t have to  . . . “

“Shut up!” Robert rasped, and then turned to Stannis.  “Children.  You said children . . . as in more than one?” 

“I did,” Stannis affirmed.  Renly’s eyebrows knit together and he looked at Robert. 

Unexpectedly, Robert stopped rubbing his forehead and broke out into a wide grin.  “And the month off at the beginning of the year . . . that’s when she’s due?”

Renly shot a look back at Stannis to see him smile as much as his older brother was capable of such a facial gesture.  _Stannis was going to be a father again!_

Even more unexpected was Robert rising his girth up from behind his desk and coming around it to Stannis, who stood up and extended a hand, obviously expecting a handshake.  Renly was sure the sky was falling when, instead of taking Stannis’ hand, Robert threw his arms around him and slapped him on the back a few times before letting go.  Renly had never seen Stannis so taken aback. 

“You’re right,” Robert said, leaning back against the front of his desk as Stannis sat down again; Renly was sure he was still in a state of shock.  “I do need to man up.  You’re also right that we need to work toward my retirement and it will take five years or more to train Renly to take enough off your plate to be able to call himself COO.”  Robert cast his bleary eyes on him, “You will grow the fuck up and stop the clubbing.  Office hours will be eight to five at a minimum or I’ll sign the papers Stannis draws up to stop your salary myself.” 

Renly opened his mouth to protest and Robert leaned toward him while speaking to both of them.  “Meeting over, now both of you get the hell out of my office!”

Following Stannis out, Renly walked with him as far as Stannis’ office, figuring he’d better get used to going a little further down the manager’s area to his own office.  Before Stannis turned to enter through the open doorway, Renly asked him, “What’s it like to have a family that really cares about you?”

Stannis raised an eyebrow to accent his annoyed scowl.  “You’ve always had a family that cared about you, Renly.”

“You know what I mean,” Renly pressed.  “One that shows you affection?  That back slap was the closest the three of us have ever been to such a display with one another.”   

“It’s the most incredible thing ever.”  Stannis gave him a look Renly knew was meant to convey that he cared about him although you had to have passed Scowls 101 to interpret it. 

As Stannis started to walk into his office, Renly called to his back.  “Let me take you, Sansa, and Shireen to dinner next week to celebrate.”

“Bring Loras with you,” Stannis accepted, not bothering to turn around as he shut the door behind him.  


End file.
